I Refuse to Let It Get Me Down

I was going to post one of my “Debbie Downer Infertility Posts” tonight.  You know, the whole “we’ve been trying now for over a year for #2” thing (not to mention the year of trying it took to have MM).  The icing on the cake this month was not yet another negative home pregnancy test–I’m actually used to those by now, but the fact that I can’t take fertility meds this cycle because I have not one, but two, large cysts on my itty-bitty half ovary.  If I did take the meds I run a very high chance of the cysts getting out-of-control, turning, and cutting off blood supply to the only ovary I have left.  No thank you.

But you know what?  I don’t want to be that person tonight.  I don’t want to be gloom and doom.  All day long I’ve been talking to God (‘Hi, God, it’s Natalie again.  Got one more thing I wanna talk about…’) and I feel better.  I’m just praying that I get a feeling of peace about all this soon.  Do we stop the fertility drugs?  Do we keep trying?  Do we stop the temping/the charting/the ovulation predictor kits?  Do we adopt?  Domestic?  International?   Do we decide that one child is enough?  Because right now I have no peace and I need it.

Woah, that just got long-winded and I so didn’t want that to happen.

So, since I want to lighten the mood and I haven’t done this in at least four years…


Yep, you heard right.  Ask anything you like, as many questions as you like.  Random things.  Things you’ve been wondering for years.  About me.  About the house.  Anything you want.  Whatever goes!


In other news, last week I found a perfect “big girl bed” at a local antiques store for a steal (Dare I say how much?  $65!).  It was in such good shape all we had to do was paint it since I wasn’t a fan of the black and gold, haha.  Here’s Mary Margaret “in” her bed, before we painted it. 

5 Responses to I Refuse to Let It Get Me Down

  1. Tonia June 5, 2010 at 12:28 am #

    I know it’s hard but hopefully trying to keep apositive attitude will help you find peace.

    I’m very jealous of the bed find 😉 I tried the Scotts Antique – great stuff but didn’t find a bed. Found one I really liked today on Craig’s List, but unfortunately it’s the wrong size. She was nice enough to tell me where she bought it. I’m going to try and check it out this weekend, but I have a feeling a new one won’t be the bargain I’m hoping for.

  2. aunt margaret June 5, 2010 at 4:22 am #

    Poor Baby! Nat, I am praying that you will soon have peace of mind about all this too. I am so sorry you have to go through this over and over. Keep the faith whatever! I love you! Love the bed !

  3. Wendy June 5, 2010 at 3:38 pm #

    Don’t have any burning question today! Although I do love your home!
    Wanted to let you know that you will be in my prayers! Wouldn’t it be the best if we could email God and he could email us an answer right back! We did the infertility thing for 3 years, had losses in there, adopted twice and one surprise! Sometimes I felt like my thoughts crowded out God’s voice and visa versa. Just wanted you to know I understand this crazy rollar coaster of infertility and you’ll be in our prayers.

  4. Ashley June 5, 2010 at 8:58 pm #

    Hey Miss Natalie! I hope you are enjoying your summer! Don’t you dare worry about a thing! God already has this worked out! Even though you are going crazy with wonders and worries, he already knows what is in store for you! So just enjoy every day you have with that little miracle of yours and when you least expect it your answer will come!

    Okay~ as for a question~ How did you find out the whole history of your house? We live in a house built in 1922 and have searched and searched for the history of the house and all we have is what has been passed down by word of mouth.


  5. Laura June 20, 2010 at 11:09 pm #

    I’m a little late, but I have a few questions! I know you have a degree in historic preservation, but what do you do with your degree? What style is your home?

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